The Greatest Gift...

I have been going through some personal changes over the past year. I have constantly tormented myself with the question of WHY? Why do we exist, Why is there so much pain and suffering in the world, Why do we hurt the ones we love?, Why does humanity seem lacking in moral character?... Maybe, it is because I am growing older, maybe it is because I am still adjusting to an instant family... I am not really sure. When the doctor did my yearly well woman exam, he suggested a baseline mamogram and I went and a lump was found. One I could not even feel. I had to go back for an ultrasound, the radiologist doing it, stopped for a minute and went and got a Dr. I was so frightened and immeadiately I went numb. I was told it was a septated cyst and one in nine are cancerous. I could not believe what I was hearing. I was totally in shock. I had it removed and everything came back okay and I was so totally thankful. During this whole ordeal, my husband was there beside me in a way only he could be. I love his sense of humor and his quiet way of loving me. He told me that in the worse case scenerio that IF i had to have chemo, then I would lose all the weight I had been wanting to lose and if they had to take my breasts then I would be able to get the breasts of mine and his dreams. When he said that I died laughing, and loved him so much more than I already did.
I guess my point in this rambling is that this year my depth of understanding the greastest gift has matured and grown more than I thought possible. Bill and I were meant to be together and the boys were meant to be with us as well. If i never have another thing in my life, it would not matter...as long as I have my greatest gift, Bill....

Merry Christmas everyone...

Re'